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You’re NOT Dead Yet! Get up! - Michelle Mras

You’re NOT Dead Yet! Get up! - Michelle Mras

Where to begin? Michelle has had some serious bumps in her life’s journey but it led her to shift her mindset and realize she was creating her own life. She discovered that the goals she had set for herself, like becoming an engineer, she didn’t even want. “I thought I wanted a house with a white picket fence line with rose bushes. Turns out, that isn’t even what I truly wanted. I want a cottage on the beach. That’s what I’m working for!” Michelle has written two books and is sought after on an international scale for Ted X talks. When you listen to her here you will understand why. She is a success coach and a communication trainer. If you want to reach out to her here’s how:

www.michellemras.com

Links to everywhere are found on her website.

Book: Eat, Drink, and Be Merry – A glimpse of a life lived well

Book: It’s Not Luck – Overcoming You

Book: Hold My Crown

Transcript
WEBVTT 1 00:00:03.560 --> 00:00:07.280 Hey, Dr g here. Thank you for listening to moving up stream without 2 00:00:07.320 --> 00:00:11.119 a paddle. I would like to work with businesses, authors, coaches and 3 00:00:11.119 --> 00:00:15.960 the like who understand the importance of shifting perspectives to obtain the results we're looking 4 00:00:15.960 --> 00:00:19.800 for. And please to announce that moving up stream without a paddle is now 5 00:00:19.839 --> 00:00:24.920 offering commercial spots to be aired during the episodes. If you believe your organization 6 00:00:24.920 --> 00:00:29.079 would benefit from advertising on the PODCAST, I would love to have you be 7 00:00:29.120 --> 00:00:33.840 a part of this continuously growing show. Let's get connected and inspire the world 8 00:00:33.920 --> 00:00:43.759 together. WHAT'S UP, everybody? Welcome back to the moving up stream without 9 00:00:43.759 --> 00:00:48.479 a paddle podcast, and today I have a very special guest, Michelle Mraz. 10 00:00:48.520 --> 00:00:52.079 Hopefully I've pronounced that right. Um, meant to ask her that before 11 00:00:52.079 --> 00:00:55.119 I came on here, but if not, we'll just clear that up afterwards. 12 00:00:55.200 --> 00:00:59.479 Um. But Michelle is she's an international tedex speaker, Um Communication trainer, 13 00:01:00.039 --> 00:01:04.480 success coach, Co host of the Denim and Pearls podcast, the author 14 00:01:04.519 --> 00:01:08.640 of eat, drink and be merry, a glimpse into a life will lived, 15 00:01:10.079 --> 00:01:14.840 and also the book it's not luck overcoming you. Michelle is the host 16 00:01:15.000 --> 00:01:19.719 of the mental shift television show and the new on the new channel in the 17 00:01:19.719 --> 00:01:25.239 Philippines. Michelle is. She is a survivor of multiple life challenges and I 18 00:01:25.239 --> 00:01:27.840 know very little about about this, so we're really gonna unfold this on the 19 00:01:27.840 --> 00:01:33.760 show and I'm really excited for that. But she's survivor multiple challenges um including 20 00:01:33.879 --> 00:01:38.480 a traumatic brain injury and her current battle with breast cancer. She guides her 21 00:01:38.519 --> 00:01:42.439 clients to recognize the innate gifts within them, to stop apologizing for what they 22 00:01:42.439 --> 00:01:49.040 are not and step into who they truly are. She accomplishes this through one 23 00:01:49.079 --> 00:01:53.599 on one and Group coaching, training events, Kenote talks, also through her 24 00:01:53.640 --> 00:01:57.439 books, through her podcast and the mental shift television show. Michelle's driving thought 25 00:01:57.560 --> 00:02:01.599 is that every day is a gift, tomorrow is never promised and every moment 26 00:02:01.640 --> 00:02:07.039 as an opportunity to be the best version of you unapologetically. So I'm so 27 00:02:07.080 --> 00:02:10.759 excited to have this conversation with Michelle and that's going to be coming up right 28 00:02:10.759 --> 00:02:16.240 after this. Welcome to moving up stream without a paddle, the podcast that 29 00:02:16.319 --> 00:02:21.439 helps develop a mindset for success. I'm your host, Dr Garrett Goggins, 30 00:02:21.639 --> 00:02:24.599 but most people call me Dr g. Now I've dedicated my life to helping 31 00:02:24.639 --> 00:02:30.879 others understand that if you have the proper mindset, you can propel yourself up 32 00:02:30.919 --> 00:02:36.199 that proverbial stream with no paddle, needing af you're constantly feeling like you're going 33 00:02:36.240 --> 00:02:39.759 against the flow, but you're never happy with your results. It's really time 34 00:02:39.800 --> 00:02:44.919 to flip your mindset. If that's something that you're ready to do, you've 35 00:02:44.960 --> 00:03:02.479 come to the right place. Now let's get to it. Hello, Michelle, 36 00:03:02.680 --> 00:03:07.599 welcome to the show. Hope you're a mute. I mean see if 37 00:03:07.599 --> 00:03:12.280 we can get you off mute. I did that. There you go. 38 00:03:12.919 --> 00:03:16.000 Thanks for having me. Dr G, you're very welcome. I'm really excited 39 00:03:16.039 --> 00:03:21.319 for this because we were introduced actually through my sister, and she said you 40 00:03:21.479 --> 00:03:24.840 have to have this person on your show. She has such an amazing story 41 00:03:25.240 --> 00:03:29.759 and she would be perfect for it. So, Um, here you are, 42 00:03:29.919 --> 00:03:31.919 and so I'm really anxious to really dive into your story. And so, 43 00:03:32.000 --> 00:03:35.199 if you don't mind, what I usually like to do is just give 44 00:03:35.240 --> 00:03:38.560 the guests center stage, giving them the micro out the gate, so they 45 00:03:38.599 --> 00:03:43.360 can tell their story and in ways that I obviously could never do. So 46 00:03:43.680 --> 00:03:46.439 if you're open to that, you could just take it away and let us 47 00:03:46.439 --> 00:03:50.120 know what you do while you do it and how you got there. Well, 48 00:03:50.159 --> 00:03:52.759 what I do and how I got here. Well, let's let's start 49 00:03:52.759 --> 00:03:55.319 a little bit back. I used to run political campaigns and write for other 50 00:03:55.400 --> 00:03:59.919 people, and I thought my spot in the world was to write for other 51 00:04:00.000 --> 00:04:02.240 people so they could change the world. And in two thousand fourteen I was 52 00:04:02.280 --> 00:04:06.280 in a car accident, and it looked like a minor one. Really Um 53 00:04:06.319 --> 00:04:10.639 a little girl ran to stop signed hit me, my engine fell out, 54 00:04:10.759 --> 00:04:15.000 rolled underneath me and I thought I was fine. But about twelve days later 55 00:04:15.120 --> 00:04:21.079 I stopped putting sentences together and then I started fragmenting, then I stopped talking, 56 00:04:21.360 --> 00:04:26.000 then I stopped walking, and for two years I was stuck that way 57 00:04:26.279 --> 00:04:30.319 and although I was completely cognizant in my head, I couldn't get anything out 58 00:04:30.759 --> 00:04:33.399 and I was being taken care about the wounded warrior center, harmonized brain, 59 00:04:33.480 --> 00:04:38.160 all sorts of brains places, and they said, you know, you've got 60 00:04:38.199 --> 00:04:42.160 dead spots your head. So I'm missing my frontal lobe over my left ear 61 00:04:42.199 --> 00:04:45.720 the back of my head and my two hemispheres had disconnected. That's why I 62 00:04:45.720 --> 00:04:49.879 couldn't talk or walk. And while I was in my head, I stelf 63 00:04:49.879 --> 00:04:55.319 examined myself, and when you're stuck with your with your inner thoughts, and 64 00:04:55.360 --> 00:04:59.040 you can't get away from them, it's it's quite the battle because you're fighting 65 00:04:59.040 --> 00:05:02.199 for your life every day because everything you've ever done wrong in your life is 66 00:05:02.240 --> 00:05:05.480 hitting at you. And while I was stuck in my head, I wrote 67 00:05:05.480 --> 00:05:08.920 a book. If I was ever going to get out of this, I 68 00:05:08.959 --> 00:05:12.600 was going to write it down, because I found my way out by arguing 69 00:05:12.639 --> 00:05:15.000 with my inner critic. That's my second book. It's not luck overcoming you. 70 00:05:15.639 --> 00:05:20.759 Um about two years in I was sitting on my couch really depressed. 71 00:05:21.160 --> 00:05:24.800 I thought it was only a month. So this is what's crazy. I 72 00:05:24.800 --> 00:05:27.800 thought it was a month that I was down. It was two years and 73 00:05:27.959 --> 00:05:31.439 I'm sitting on the couch screaming at God in the universe. If you hate 74 00:05:31.480 --> 00:05:34.240 me so much, then kill me, but don't leave me like this. 75 00:05:35.759 --> 00:05:43.040 And I heard you're not dead yet. Get up, so I did. 76 00:05:44.360 --> 00:05:46.480 I got up and I followed my knees because in that moment that I heard 77 00:05:46.480 --> 00:05:50.079 you're not dead yet, get up, I saw every time anything bad in 78 00:05:50.120 --> 00:05:55.120 my life had happened, anything I thought was bad, and each time there 79 00:05:55.160 --> 00:05:57.560 was always someone with me. I was never alone, and what I saw 80 00:05:57.680 --> 00:06:02.720 in those that flash was M I would have been dead if he wanted me 81 00:06:02.800 --> 00:06:06.000 dead or the universe wanted me dead. There was a reason for me to 82 00:06:06.040 --> 00:06:11.360 live, and I remember saying thank you for everything bad that has ever happened, 83 00:06:11.439 --> 00:06:14.480 thank you for all the trials. I'm doing the air quote. Thank 84 00:06:14.519 --> 00:06:17.040 you for all the trials, because what they did is they were preparing me 85 00:06:17.079 --> 00:06:21.480 for the next thing. Now. When I started, my husband said he 86 00:06:21.519 --> 00:06:26.040 came home that day, I'm on the computer and I he said, how 87 00:06:26.040 --> 00:06:30.040 did you get here and I said I have to speak. He said how 88 00:06:30.040 --> 00:06:32.199 are you speaking? I said I have to speak. That's all. I 89 00:06:32.240 --> 00:06:34.600 kept saying, I have to speak, I have to speak, and I 90 00:06:34.639 --> 00:06:38.759 found an email that said, my dear Michelle, we'd love for you to 91 00:06:38.839 --> 00:06:42.360 join us on Ted X. I've been out for two years. I didn't 92 00:06:42.399 --> 00:06:46.959 know what a Ted X was. So I said yes and ended up being 93 00:06:47.000 --> 00:06:50.480 on Ted X in October or whatever, and I did this Ted X. 94 00:06:50.560 --> 00:06:55.000 I came off the stage, everyone's clapping, it was a standing ovation and 95 00:06:55.240 --> 00:06:58.360 a woman comes up to me. She has where's your book, and I 96 00:06:58.360 --> 00:07:00.759 said I don't have a book. And she has, you better have one. 97 00:07:00.399 --> 00:07:03.920 And so that's when I wrote eat, drink and be merry. A 98 00:07:03.920 --> 00:07:08.720 glimpse into a life well lived. It's the the continuing story of my Ted 99 00:07:08.920 --> 00:07:12.160 X. It's about my mother in law and how she lived her life and 100 00:07:12.199 --> 00:07:15.600 how I did my best to emulate her to live a life that was full 101 00:07:15.759 --> 00:07:18.800 and the lessons she gave us. A that I shared on the Ted X 102 00:07:18.879 --> 00:07:23.000 was number one, you have to have a plan, but you have to 103 00:07:23.000 --> 00:07:25.680 be flexible on that plan of how you get there. It's like a GPS. 104 00:07:25.879 --> 00:07:29.319 You need a direction, but be really flexible on which road you're gonna 105 00:07:29.319 --> 00:07:31.720 take to get there. Number two, eat dessert. First, life is 106 00:07:31.759 --> 00:07:36.240 too short to not enjoy the little things, because when your last days are 107 00:07:36.279 --> 00:07:40.040 there, the last thing you're going to think about is what's your or R 108 00:07:40.079 --> 00:07:43.360 O i. The last thing you think about is do people know I care? 109 00:07:43.800 --> 00:07:46.720 Did I should contribute to society? And then the last, the third 110 00:07:46.720 --> 00:07:51.959 one was quote by Ellen Glasgow. The differences between a Rut and a grave 111 00:07:53.040 --> 00:07:58.680 other dimensions. If you keep sticking in that exact pattern and expect something different, 112 00:07:59.720 --> 00:08:05.360 you're Einstein's definition of insane. You must do something different to expect something 113 00:08:05.399 --> 00:08:11.120 different, and so I did that book for her and my career as a 114 00:08:11.120 --> 00:08:13.800 speaker blew up. I mean I started being asked to speak all over the 115 00:08:13.800 --> 00:08:18.160 place. One An award in India. Went to New Delhi to get this 116 00:08:18.439 --> 00:08:22.680 inspirational woman award out of New Delhi from the women's economic form. I mean 117 00:08:22.800 --> 00:08:26.079 went to Dublin, Ireland, and it's just it went crazy, wonderful. 118 00:08:28.279 --> 00:08:33.600 And while I was in my travels, I got sick and again I'm standing 119 00:08:33.600 --> 00:08:37.120 in front of the mirror this time and I'm looking at myself doing something's wrong. 120 00:08:37.399 --> 00:08:41.360 I kept having nightmares of dying. Something's really wrong. So I called 121 00:08:41.360 --> 00:08:43.600 the dog and he says, you know, you have a brain injury. 122 00:08:43.120 --> 00:08:46.960 It's your brain playing tricks on you. I'm like no, I'm pretty sure 123 00:08:46.960 --> 00:08:52.159 I'm dying. And again I'm standing from the mirror and I hear another voice. 124 00:08:52.840 --> 00:09:00.279 You have cancer, get it out. Side Note. Never go to 125 00:09:00.360 --> 00:09:03.639 a doctor and say some unseen voice told me I had cancer and I have 126 00:09:03.720 --> 00:09:07.600 to get it out. So never do that. But that's kind of what 127 00:09:07.679 --> 00:09:11.240 I did. I have a feeling I've got cancer, so I went there 128 00:09:11.279 --> 00:09:13.279 and they checked me out and it took me eight months for them to finally 129 00:09:13.360 --> 00:09:18.519 find the cancer and I had. I've been diagnosed with breast cancer. It's 130 00:09:18.559 --> 00:09:22.399 a rare it's called pageant's disease of the breasts, like points. Those are 131 00:09:22.559 --> 00:09:26.559 one percent of all breast cancer people get this. And so it didn't have 132 00:09:26.600 --> 00:09:30.679 a lump, it didn't do it didn't show the normal signs of breast cancer. 133 00:09:31.159 --> 00:09:35.039 But because I knew it was there and I was persistent, they got 134 00:09:35.080 --> 00:09:37.240 it off of me. So I have a double miss sect to me and 135 00:09:37.600 --> 00:09:41.240 my life has altered. So when I had that first brain injury and I 136 00:09:41.279 --> 00:09:43.000 said, Oh, I didn't tell you that part, I said, give 137 00:09:43.039 --> 00:09:46.519 me back my brain. I don't care about the body, just give me 138 00:09:46.559 --> 00:09:48.720 back my brain so I can talk again. Well, with the breast cancer, 139 00:09:48.759 --> 00:09:52.759 I realized I was tested. Okay, we're taking your body. How 140 00:09:52.840 --> 00:09:56.759 much do you want it now? I want my body, have body and 141 00:09:56.799 --> 00:10:00.600 I'll take care of my body and my brain. And what I learned was 142 00:10:00.639 --> 00:10:03.440 that my body, my brain and my soul were all one. Not Anything 143 00:10:03.600 --> 00:10:07.480 is bigger or better than the other. They all are together. And if 144 00:10:07.519 --> 00:10:11.240 I wanted to take care and and give this word out to the world of 145 00:10:11.360 --> 00:10:16.120 encouragement that you can, you can go upstream without a paddle, that I 146 00:10:16.159 --> 00:10:18.960 had to have my mind, my body and my soul all congruent, and 147 00:10:20.000 --> 00:10:24.679 so I took this challenge to be the best version of myself every day. 148 00:10:24.799 --> 00:10:28.960 And so that's why my my big quote from Maya Angelo as my mission in 149 00:10:28.080 --> 00:10:31.639 life is not merely to survive, but to thrive and do so with some 150 00:10:31.679 --> 00:10:37.000 passion, some compassion, some humor and some style, because I realized that 151 00:10:37.679 --> 00:10:43.039 life truly is too short to squander and I want to drag as many people 152 00:10:43.080 --> 00:10:48.720 with me out of that fog of thinking they're already dead and realize that life 153 00:10:48.799 --> 00:10:52.120 is too short and that we all have a gift to give. We just 154 00:10:52.159 --> 00:10:58.200 have to figure out what that gift is. Right and you. So it's 155 00:10:58.559 --> 00:11:03.279 there's the interesting shift that happens there with you, because you and I love 156 00:11:03.320 --> 00:11:07.399 how you start off. You started off the story with I was helping others 157 00:11:07.000 --> 00:11:11.720 get their voice out and become, you know, tell their stories and do 158 00:11:11.799 --> 00:11:16.000 that in a way, but it was almost like it took this event just 159 00:11:16.039 --> 00:11:22.080 to to inform you that, no, you have the story. You're the 160 00:11:22.120 --> 00:11:24.120 one that should be out there helping people, and there's nothing wrong with people 161 00:11:24.120 --> 00:11:28.279 who do ghost rowdy, I'm not gonna say that. That's not the no, 162 00:11:28.360 --> 00:11:33.039 I mean, cool, that's I thought it wasn't exactly. That's what 163 00:11:33.039 --> 00:11:35.399 I was trying to get to is that you had a calling, you had 164 00:11:35.440 --> 00:11:41.799 a story that needed to be told, and did you feel like it like 165 00:11:41.080 --> 00:11:45.639 that? Really was this this piece that says it was God, universe, 166 00:11:45.799 --> 00:11:50.159 higher power saying I have, I have a mission for you. Did you? 167 00:11:50.200 --> 00:11:52.679 Did you figure that out in the end, or was it something that, 168 00:11:54.600 --> 00:11:58.200 because we always tell these stories right, right, it just sounds like 169 00:11:58.240 --> 00:12:00.120 it's just like, Oh, get up, okay, I got up, 170 00:12:00.120 --> 00:12:03.759 but there's there's a process that happens through that. And so, and that's 171 00:12:03.799 --> 00:12:07.360 the part I want to get into, is so you have, you heard 172 00:12:07.399 --> 00:12:09.159 the voice and you got up and you were telling your your husband. I 173 00:12:09.200 --> 00:12:13.039 have to speak, I have to speak. But what was going up in 174 00:12:13.120 --> 00:12:16.960 here? Because it wasn't just an overnight, or maybe it was an overnight. 175 00:12:16.039 --> 00:12:20.399 Just now I'm better. Let's go. No, I kept falling, 176 00:12:20.440 --> 00:12:24.440 actually, so I got up, I moved, I was able to move, 177 00:12:24.480 --> 00:12:26.960 but I had to go back the therapy to learn how to walk in 178 00:12:26.679 --> 00:12:31.120 get my eyes balanced. So I went from sitting on the couch thinking I 179 00:12:31.200 --> 00:12:37.000 was withering away too. I must move, I must work, I must 180 00:12:37.240 --> 00:12:39.559 and so it was like, okay, now I need to eat the right 181 00:12:39.639 --> 00:12:41.960 vitamins, I have to get the right things and me to feed my brain, 182 00:12:43.159 --> 00:12:46.519 and so I started going to all sorts of things to to heal myself, 183 00:12:46.960 --> 00:12:50.360 and that's where I oh, maybe your sister may not have told you 184 00:12:50.399 --> 00:12:54.519 this. If you look at my ted X, I was three and eighty 185 00:12:54.600 --> 00:12:58.919 nine pounds and I am no longer three nine pounds. So what I was 186 00:13:00.120 --> 00:13:01.799 told was, you know, you're you're an older woman, you're in your 187 00:13:01.840 --> 00:13:05.440 fifties, you can't drop anymore weight. This is how you are. Just 188 00:13:05.519 --> 00:13:07.919 settle your pains. That's normal. And so all these things I had just 189 00:13:09.519 --> 00:13:11.480 you know, we let society put things on top of us and we accept 190 00:13:11.519 --> 00:13:16.200 them as reality. And what I realized in all that you're not dead yet 191 00:13:16.240 --> 00:13:22.320 get up parts, was we create our reality. We choose what we want 192 00:13:22.480 --> 00:13:26.200 and what we do not want in our lives. And if we want more 193 00:13:26.240 --> 00:13:28.960 negative, let's start focusing on it. You get more negative. If I 194 00:13:28.000 --> 00:13:31.519 want more positive, I need to focus on positive, and I could get 195 00:13:31.559 --> 00:13:35.960 more of that. And so I realized that everything that happened in my life 196 00:13:35.120 --> 00:13:39.960 was part. I took ownership for everything that happened in my life. So 197 00:13:39.000 --> 00:13:43.360 even people do. How can you do that? How would you take cancer 198 00:13:43.440 --> 00:13:46.039 as owned? I did, because I didn't take care of myself. You 199 00:13:46.080 --> 00:13:50.480 know, I was high stressed, always worried about everything. I was internalizing 200 00:13:50.679 --> 00:13:56.480 everything around me and I think I broke myself down. And now, if 201 00:13:56.519 --> 00:14:00.960 you see me, if you meet me, I'm always smiling because I realized 202 00:14:01.039 --> 00:14:05.519 that I got another chance. I got another chance, not just for myself, 203 00:14:05.679 --> 00:14:07.759 but to take the veil off of other people so they don't have to 204 00:14:07.759 --> 00:14:13.600 worry about the next chance they can live, and it fires my soul. 205 00:14:15.039 --> 00:14:18.440 Yeah, well, and that's UH, the committee. That's I haven't mentor 206 00:14:18.559 --> 00:14:24.360 John Tolar Rico. He's he's just an amazing man and he talks about the 207 00:14:24.399 --> 00:14:28.279 committee. And that's what was going on right this you, you're getting up 208 00:14:28.279 --> 00:14:33.159 in this. The the voices, the society and all these things are telling 209 00:14:33.159 --> 00:14:37.639 you what you can and what you can't do and and how did you create 210 00:14:37.679 --> 00:14:41.039 the cancer? But when we come to the self realization, when we go 211 00:14:41.080 --> 00:14:45.679 if we really look back into life and how we focus on the stress piece 212 00:14:46.240 --> 00:14:50.639 and how we're constantly in that negative uh aura or wherever you want to say 213 00:14:50.639 --> 00:14:56.600 it. There's there are physical things that happens to our body because of where 214 00:14:56.039 --> 00:15:01.919 we hold ourselves, when we keep ourselves in that position, and so it's 215 00:15:03.360 --> 00:15:07.080 it's actually a beautiful awareness that you had that. No, I'm taking ownership 216 00:15:07.120 --> 00:15:11.399 of everything that was going on to me because I wasn't doing the things that 217 00:15:11.440 --> 00:15:13.840 I should have been, living the way I should have been, eating the 218 00:15:13.840 --> 00:15:16.559 foods that I should have been and you really brought it back to this this 219 00:15:16.639 --> 00:15:22.919 holistic aspect of everything about you had to change, and I didn't know she 220 00:15:22.000 --> 00:15:24.960 did. Actually, I think maybe my sister did tell me about the weight 221 00:15:26.000 --> 00:15:30.120 piece, but I didn't remember until you just said that and everything just we 222 00:15:30.159 --> 00:15:33.200 started to become in line with you. But then the other aspect too. 223 00:15:33.200 --> 00:15:37.159 But, and this is where you might get a lot of flak, is 224 00:15:37.840 --> 00:15:41.840 the cancer was testing you and that a lot of people want to understand that. 225 00:15:41.960 --> 00:15:46.240 So can can you kind of explain your thought process behind the behind that 226 00:15:46.399 --> 00:15:52.279 statement? Well, because the reason I see what the test was. I 227 00:15:52.320 --> 00:15:56.159 wanted my brain back. I really didn't give a crap about my body. 228 00:15:56.399 --> 00:15:58.919 I wanted my brain. I'm a smart woman and I wanted that brain back 229 00:16:00.279 --> 00:16:04.080 that I let my body go. And I see that breast cancer was my 230 00:16:04.159 --> 00:16:08.600 test, because do you really not want your body? Can Your brain move 231 00:16:08.679 --> 00:16:12.600 without it? You know, it's like, oh wait, I need to 232 00:16:12.639 --> 00:16:15.639 keep this stay healthy, I gotta keep it moving. This is the engine, 233 00:16:15.679 --> 00:16:18.639 you know, this is this is the vehicle that the engine has to 234 00:16:18.679 --> 00:16:22.639 go into. This engine needs something. And so I see it as a 235 00:16:22.720 --> 00:16:27.480 challenge because not only did it make me evaluate what I saw as a priority 236 00:16:27.480 --> 00:16:30.679 in my life and what wasn't, but it made me evaluate the things I 237 00:16:30.720 --> 00:16:34.080 thought I had to have in my life versus the things I really didn't have 238 00:16:34.120 --> 00:16:37.480 to have in my life. And as I moved through this cancer journey, 239 00:16:37.720 --> 00:16:42.399 anyone who's ever known anyone with cancer or it has cancer or experienced cancer in 240 00:16:42.399 --> 00:16:48.559 any way, your diet gets very, very narrow, very fast. The 241 00:16:48.679 --> 00:16:51.600 old me would have said, I can't do that, I can't give up 242 00:16:51.600 --> 00:16:56.000 bread. I love bread. The cancer me said, heckt'm that feeding that 243 00:16:56.080 --> 00:16:57.840 to my body anymore, and it was like, instantly I didn't need it 244 00:16:59.559 --> 00:17:03.240 and realized that's when I realized that it was all a choice. There were 245 00:17:03.320 --> 00:17:04.519 choices I didn't want to get rid of, I didn't want to let go 246 00:17:04.559 --> 00:17:07.119 of, and then there are choices I want. There is really no choice 247 00:17:07.160 --> 00:17:11.039 here. This is I will kill myself if I don't give this thing up. 248 00:17:11.319 --> 00:17:17.680 And so I took ownership of that test. I'm going to pass that 249 00:17:17.759 --> 00:17:19.759 test. And if you're you know I'm always saying I'm smart, well, 250 00:17:19.799 --> 00:17:23.519 then pass the test. Woman, what are you gonna do? Well, 251 00:17:23.559 --> 00:17:26.599 I'm going to listen to what they said. I'M gonna clean up my diet, 252 00:17:26.680 --> 00:17:30.160 I'm gonna make sure I get all the vitamins, I'm gonna exercise when 253 00:17:30.160 --> 00:17:36.920 I you know, I'm going to do what my most possibly can to make 254 00:17:37.000 --> 00:17:40.960 this right so I can be here as long as possible in order to spread 255 00:17:41.000 --> 00:17:45.480 this word that you have a choice and what's happening in your life. Don't 256 00:17:45.559 --> 00:17:48.880 play victim in anything that's happening in your world. You take ownership so that 257 00:17:48.920 --> 00:17:52.759 you don't feel like a victim. If you take ownership of something in it 258 00:17:53.680 --> 00:17:59.039 you'll be able to manipulate it in your mind so that you don't fall victim 259 00:17:59.119 --> 00:18:02.079 to it. So that with my car accident, for a while I was 260 00:18:02.119 --> 00:18:04.000 like that kid ran the stop sign. She's the reason I have a brain 261 00:18:04.039 --> 00:18:11.720 injury. No, she did run the Stop Sign, but I was hurried, 262 00:18:11.319 --> 00:18:14.960 I didn't see. I saw her coming, but I didn't slow down. 263 00:18:15.319 --> 00:18:18.240 I didn't maneuver the fact that she wasn't slowing down at the stop sign. 264 00:18:18.319 --> 00:18:22.720 I saw her not slowing down at the stop sign, but I didn't 265 00:18:22.799 --> 00:18:26.400 hit my break until I saw her again in front of me. I take 266 00:18:26.400 --> 00:18:30.599 ownership for the fact that I didn't prepare sooner. Now I'm no longer the 267 00:18:30.680 --> 00:18:33.480 victim in that. Now I know that I played a part in that accident 268 00:18:33.720 --> 00:18:37.359 and it gives me some sort of sense of control in the world, in 269 00:18:37.440 --> 00:18:42.960 my world. Yeah, yeah, take ownership. Take Ownership. That's that's 270 00:18:44.359 --> 00:18:48.480 yes, absolutely. And you know, when my journey is not the same 271 00:18:48.519 --> 00:18:49.960 as yours, and no one is going to be the same age. Everybody 272 00:18:49.960 --> 00:18:53.119 has their own journey, but we all have to look at that aspect and 273 00:18:53.119 --> 00:18:56.640 I had to look at mine too and say, well, where, where 274 00:18:56.759 --> 00:19:00.240 was my part in that? What did I do? It's so easy to 275 00:19:00.279 --> 00:19:03.039 say, you know, Oh, I'm divorced, it was my wife's fault 276 00:19:03.039 --> 00:19:06.680 and over my husband's fault, or I lost my job, or or Blah, 277 00:19:06.720 --> 00:19:07.839 blah, blah, and my boss is this. But but what? 278 00:19:07.839 --> 00:19:12.039 What was you? Where's your role? Let's stop focusing on what other people 279 00:19:12.079 --> 00:19:17.960 are doing, because it's what happens in here that can alter what's happening on 280 00:19:18.000 --> 00:19:22.519 that external and so if you can take ownership of that piece, its game 281 00:19:22.599 --> 00:19:26.480 changer. You can really begin to, like you were saying, manifest things 282 00:19:26.519 --> 00:19:30.720 and and and really have control, because we're writing, and I left how 283 00:19:30.759 --> 00:19:33.240 you said that too. We are writing our own story, we're writing our 284 00:19:33.279 --> 00:19:38.960 own life. But we can't do that if we're putting a blame on other 285 00:19:40.000 --> 00:19:41.400 people, if we're waiting for other people to do stuff. Well, that's 286 00:19:41.400 --> 00:19:45.720 not us right in our life, we're waiting for others to write our life. 287 00:19:45.720 --> 00:19:49.880 And so that ownership piece has to happen for you to really go where 288 00:19:49.880 --> 00:19:53.799 it is that you want to go. Yes, well, and Byron Katie. 289 00:19:53.799 --> 00:19:57.039 She was a big part of my brain recovery. I had studied her 290 00:19:57.079 --> 00:20:00.480 a lot. She has a quote that I live body. She says there's 291 00:20:00.519 --> 00:20:04.319 three types of control in this world. There's my control, the other person's 292 00:20:04.319 --> 00:20:10.799 control, in Goden universe control. What can you control? And once I 293 00:20:10.839 --> 00:20:14.960 got that fixed in my brain. It's like whenever I feel uncomfortable or things 294 00:20:14.960 --> 00:20:18.960 seeing chaotic and to stop. What can I control? Oh, how I 295 00:20:18.039 --> 00:20:22.640 perceive that. Okay, let it go, I mean, and it takes 296 00:20:22.680 --> 00:20:26.640 a lot of stress away from me and when I share that with other people, 297 00:20:26.960 --> 00:20:30.160 it takes a lot of stress from their lives. To take ownership for 298 00:20:30.319 --> 00:20:34.920 what you do and stop playing victim. It's a lot easier to play victim, 299 00:20:34.960 --> 00:20:38.240 but it's a lot more empowering to know where you play in that place 300 00:20:38.519 --> 00:20:45.039 and that role. Yeah, and and the other piece too, and I 301 00:20:45.119 --> 00:20:48.880 like, okay, we're gonna go backwards. I'm jumping around. He has 302 00:20:48.920 --> 00:20:51.279 so much stuff going on in my mind because you have such an amazing story. 303 00:20:51.319 --> 00:20:52.680 But let's go back a little bit too, because we're gonna take control, 304 00:20:52.720 --> 00:20:56.519 but we're gonna take control of every aspect of what we can do. 305 00:20:56.839 --> 00:20:57.920 So you were saying, I want my mind back, I want my I 306 00:20:57.960 --> 00:21:03.279 don't care about my body, but you at the beginning, you put into 307 00:21:03.319 --> 00:21:07.440 place that they all work together. Mind, body, Spirit, they all 308 00:21:07.519 --> 00:21:11.960 work together, and so if I'm just focusing on my mind and I'm and 309 00:21:11.000 --> 00:21:15.839 I'm letting the body go, that's terrible. And let the spirit part go. 310 00:21:15.119 --> 00:21:18.519 That's terrible because I'm unbalanced. There's a there's an imbalance there. And 311 00:21:18.519 --> 00:21:22.519 then if I'm working on my mind and my body, but then I'm letting 312 00:21:22.720 --> 00:21:25.960 them lacking in the spirit, there's still an imbalance there. And so there's 313 00:21:26.039 --> 00:21:29.079 not you're not growing the way you're supposed to grow. And I love how 314 00:21:29.119 --> 00:21:32.720 you put that that they all work together, they all have to have the 315 00:21:32.759 --> 00:21:36.279 same amount of focus and they all have to be take ownership of each and 316 00:21:36.319 --> 00:21:40.240 every single piece of that to really move forward. And I feel like once 317 00:21:40.319 --> 00:21:44.119 you got that, well, I mean you were getting success before then, 318 00:21:44.200 --> 00:21:48.680 right, you're t at the TED X plus pounds, but other things happened, 319 00:21:48.759 --> 00:21:52.880 right, and then you started getting it feels like that holistic piece of 320 00:21:52.960 --> 00:21:57.599 you sort of just fell an in line and now we're here, right and 321 00:21:57.599 --> 00:22:03.480 and no one would ever look at you and go, I had no idea 322 00:22:03.519 --> 00:22:07.240 that you have one breast cancer too, had been had a major brain injury, 323 00:22:07.279 --> 00:22:10.400 that you were highly overweight, and it just looks like everything just fell 324 00:22:10.480 --> 00:22:14.599 online for you. So do you feel like applying that holistic approach to that 325 00:22:14.680 --> 00:22:18.640 mind, body soul that you are now really with in line with that person 326 00:22:18.680 --> 00:22:22.119 that you're supposed to be. Yes, I know I am the person I'm 327 00:22:22.119 --> 00:22:25.680 supposed to be. I'm still evolving and I honestly I see this mind, 328 00:22:25.720 --> 00:22:30.559 body, soul like like a molecule. They're never I mean there are different 329 00:22:30.680 --> 00:22:33.880 sizes, but their weight equals out each other. You know, they stay 330 00:22:33.000 --> 00:22:37.559 spin and so you can never say, well, this is more important and 331 00:22:37.559 --> 00:22:40.880 this is more important. No, because without this, this doesn't isn't what 332 00:22:41.000 --> 00:22:45.119 it is anymore, you know. So I see it as this holistic ball 333 00:22:45.200 --> 00:22:48.759 of molecule that bounces around and sometimes one's a little higher than the other, 334 00:22:48.960 --> 00:22:53.279 sometimes the other one's higher. And with my this this journey I've gone through, 335 00:22:55.160 --> 00:22:57.559 I didn't drop the weight until my mind came together, till my soul 336 00:22:57.599 --> 00:23:02.920 and my mind came together, and then my physical side started shrinking. It's 337 00:23:02.920 --> 00:23:06.200 when I let go of the past, when I stopped saying, you know, 338 00:23:06.880 --> 00:23:08.759 you're such a failure, you didn't finish your engineering degree, you're not 339 00:23:08.839 --> 00:23:12.799 an engineer. You you have two kids. You're supposed to have four kids, 340 00:23:14.200 --> 00:23:15.440 you're supposed to have a white picket fence. I don't know all the 341 00:23:15.519 --> 00:23:19.079 things that go through your head that you beat yourself up for. You know, 342 00:23:19.559 --> 00:23:23.400 Tommy Joe didn't ask me out to the eighth grade dance. Whatever. 343 00:23:25.359 --> 00:23:29.440 All of that crap was filling my brain when I was trapped in it. 344 00:23:30.279 --> 00:23:34.279 Every thing I've ever failed at. My inner critic pulled up, and so 345 00:23:34.359 --> 00:23:37.759 when I wrote it's not luck overcoming you, I wrote it to help other 346 00:23:37.839 --> 00:23:41.640 people get out of their own way, because that's what I had to do 347 00:23:41.759 --> 00:23:47.039 in order to find the new version of me. So, let's say someone 348 00:23:47.079 --> 00:23:48.799 says I'm afraid of hights, so I'll never I'm not going to travel because 349 00:23:48.799 --> 00:23:53.400 I'm afraid of airplanes because they're high. Well, go back in your past. 350 00:23:53.480 --> 00:23:56.319 Well, you were four at one point in your time where you were 351 00:23:56.319 --> 00:24:00.839 probably two feet tall, and you looked at a ladder that went up to 352 00:24:00.880 --> 00:24:06.480 a slide that was probably eight feet tall. Did you climb it? Probably 353 00:24:07.039 --> 00:24:10.079 so, go back to that moment. Remember you going up to the top 354 00:24:10.119 --> 00:24:12.680 of the slide and looking down and feeling what you felt. Did you die 355 00:24:12.759 --> 00:24:17.880 when you went down the slide? No, then your brain does hey, 356 00:24:18.200 --> 00:24:22.200 you aren't that afraid of heights after all. And so once you make your 357 00:24:22.240 --> 00:24:26.920 brain realize that there are things that it locked in as bad for you, 358 00:24:26.759 --> 00:24:30.359 that you have already done it. It allows you to go to the next 359 00:24:30.440 --> 00:24:33.640 level. And so that's what I did with my with my book, because 360 00:24:33.640 --> 00:24:38.960 I was walking myself through it and then walking other people through it. Why? 361 00:24:40.000 --> 00:24:44.039 Because we have to get over those self limiting beliefs that we have built 362 00:24:44.119 --> 00:24:48.160 into us, that we've ingrained into us. Or because someone says, you 363 00:24:48.200 --> 00:24:51.559 know, Susie smarter than you and math. Okay, well, that was 364 00:24:51.599 --> 00:24:53.240 just Susie, but in your mind you said everybody is better than you and 365 00:24:53.319 --> 00:24:57.480 math. And so we piece apart all the little things that have gone through 366 00:24:57.480 --> 00:25:03.960 our lives and dismiss them by proving that they are not true any longer. 367 00:25:04.720 --> 00:25:08.519 And once I did that with myself, I wanted to share that with other 368 00:25:08.559 --> 00:25:15.319 people. And what it did is it helped me realize I'm overweight, not 369 00:25:15.440 --> 00:25:18.599 because I wanted to be overweighted, I was overweighted because I thought that's what, 370 00:25:18.880 --> 00:25:23.359 sequentially, what happens to a woman. You have children, you get 371 00:25:23.400 --> 00:25:26.720 bigger, you have another child, you get bigger. You're never going to 372 00:25:26.839 --> 00:25:30.559 be the same. Your body is never the same again. And Oh, 373 00:25:30.599 --> 00:25:33.559 when you hit your fifties you might have just, you know, kiss that 374 00:25:33.640 --> 00:25:36.400 up, because it's just gonna stay with you forever. and Oh your skin, 375 00:25:36.640 --> 00:25:40.759 oh that's hormonal. You're just all these things that we believe are fact 376 00:25:41.960 --> 00:25:45.079 aren't facts unless you let them be facts in your brain. So it's like, 377 00:25:45.160 --> 00:25:51.880 Oh, I'm free, I'm free to be me, and that's what 378 00:25:52.039 --> 00:25:56.039 my mission is, is to help people realize they're free to be themselves. 379 00:25:56.400 --> 00:25:59.319 And I don't care if you, if you have a have a client, 380 00:25:59.440 --> 00:26:03.200 she's mind and you would think, oh my goodness, why is she gonna 381 00:26:03.240 --> 00:26:07.759 do this? She can't do that. No, she's found workarounds everything, 382 00:26:07.279 --> 00:26:11.599 and so she does so much. And so when you think about it, 383 00:26:11.680 --> 00:26:15.240 whatever you think you're lacking, let's say if you're missing, you know, 384 00:26:15.319 --> 00:26:18.240 lose, you don't have sight like she does. Her other senses are so 385 00:26:18.359 --> 00:26:22.759 strong that she will wrap circles around us in anything else, you know, 386 00:26:23.559 --> 00:26:29.759 and so she sees better than we do with eyes because she senses with her 387 00:26:29.880 --> 00:26:33.160 entire body. So think about the things that you have in your life that 388 00:26:33.240 --> 00:26:37.640 you think you lack. Well then let's not focus on what you lack, 389 00:26:37.759 --> 00:26:41.319 let's focus on what you've got and overcompass the things that you lack. So 390 00:26:41.359 --> 00:26:45.599 it doesn't even matter anymore. We can all achieve what we want. We 391 00:26:45.640 --> 00:26:49.279 can all go up that that stream, up that that upstream without a paddle. 392 00:26:51.000 --> 00:26:53.720 We make that choice that we can in our way, in our own 393 00:26:53.720 --> 00:26:57.079 special way, not like how everybody else does it. We all have our 394 00:26:57.079 --> 00:27:07.240 own gifts to get through. Do you have the next big thing, that 395 00:27:07.359 --> 00:27:11.319 world changing? Which McCall it? Do you have a story to tell? 396 00:27:11.880 --> 00:27:15.839 You need a website. You need the web spinners at Webin in with big 397 00:27:15.839 --> 00:27:21.400 picture solutions. Leaving together Seo, stellar web design and social media integrations. 398 00:27:21.720 --> 00:27:26.799 You'll find yourself developing your latest and greatest thing idea or telling that next chapter 399 00:27:26.960 --> 00:27:30.039 in your story. Why? Because your audience is ready for it. Looked 400 00:27:30.079 --> 00:27:34.240 them up today at Webinit DOT com. And remember, you're not everywhere unless 401 00:27:34.240 --> 00:27:48.880 you're webined. If you're finding value in this podcast, you should really check 402 00:27:48.920 --> 00:27:52.559 out where it all began. See, I wrote the book moving upstream without 403 00:27:52.559 --> 00:27:56.480 a paddle as a guide to develop the foundation for a successful mindset. Learn 404 00:27:56.519 --> 00:28:00.559 what I believe to be four of the most fundamental principles to find success in 405 00:28:00.680 --> 00:28:06.160 any endeavor, and if you apply these principles in your own life, you 406 00:28:06.200 --> 00:28:11.119 will indeed find that you can move upstream with no paddle needed. Get it 407 00:28:11.160 --> 00:28:22.640 on Amazon today. Isn't it funny, though, that we look at people 408 00:28:22.640 --> 00:28:26.039 who are blind and successful and you know, we we Helen, and I 409 00:28:26.079 --> 00:28:29.279 actually had some I guess, on here who's blind. He plays the drums, 410 00:28:29.319 --> 00:28:33.400 he bowls, he does all this stuff and he's blind and and but 411 00:28:33.440 --> 00:28:36.079 we look at them and go, Oh, well, they have that. 412 00:28:37.279 --> 00:28:40.440 We always try to make the excuses or they have the handicap, but they're 413 00:28:40.480 --> 00:28:45.240 built differently, like there's something there and so it's not even a Handicapp to 414 00:28:45.319 --> 00:28:48.279 them at this point. And they're not built differently. They don't have sight, 415 00:28:48.359 --> 00:28:52.799 but they continue on. They don't hear, but they continue on. 416 00:28:52.160 --> 00:28:56.839 But we look at that, we make excuses for ourselves to stay where we're 417 00:28:56.880 --> 00:29:00.440 at because I'm not that person. But you don't have to be person. 418 00:29:00.480 --> 00:29:04.440 They're not you. They're they're succeeding, they're going. Stop making excuses for 419 00:29:04.519 --> 00:29:11.799 yourself and you get up right, get up, you're not dead. Get 420 00:29:11.000 --> 00:29:14.720 up, do something with it. And you were built the way you were 421 00:29:14.759 --> 00:29:21.200 supposed to be, built to succeed and and these excuses. It's just so 422 00:29:21.680 --> 00:29:23.640 like my kids, they have friends they're like Oh, they're just built differently. 423 00:29:23.640 --> 00:29:26.960 And I really are they really they're not built differently. Go out there 424 00:29:27.119 --> 00:29:32.920 and my youngest, well, and I fell in this unknowingly as a parent. 425 00:29:33.160 --> 00:29:36.559 He Oh, you're not. You're not athletically inclined. It's okay, 426 00:29:36.640 --> 00:29:40.119 your brother is. You're not. You have other gifts and you do like 427 00:29:40.200 --> 00:29:44.359 you will excel stuff something more easily than maybe some others won't. But that 428 00:29:44.400 --> 00:29:47.359 doesn't mean you can't play sports and you can't excel at sports. So you 429 00:29:47.440 --> 00:29:52.039 just but you have to stop telling yourself that I'm not athletically inclined. Start 430 00:29:52.079 --> 00:29:55.440 telling yourself a different story. And this is what you had to do too. 431 00:29:55.519 --> 00:29:59.839 I had to. You had to tell yourself a different story at the 432 00:30:00.039 --> 00:30:02.799 he is not your story, right, and and now look at you. 433 00:30:03.440 --> 00:30:07.559 Yeah, you are what you think. The other analogy I love to use 434 00:30:07.599 --> 00:30:11.640 as the rubber band effect. I ever heard of it? Yes, but 435 00:30:11.759 --> 00:30:15.039 go ahead and explain it, okay. My idea of the rubber band effect 436 00:30:15.119 --> 00:30:18.839 is we are all rubber bands as humans. We are all rubber bands, 437 00:30:18.160 --> 00:30:22.039 and life bends as twist does does things, but no matter what that does 438 00:30:22.079 --> 00:30:26.200 to us, we're still rubber bands. And some people say, oh, 439 00:30:26.240 --> 00:30:29.799 but I got broken. I'm broken, I can't do anything anymore because I'm 440 00:30:29.799 --> 00:30:33.119 broken. We'll tie the rubber band in a not you're still a rubber band 441 00:30:33.279 --> 00:30:36.640 now. You have a really strong part in your rubber band. And so 442 00:30:37.039 --> 00:30:40.759 what I see, if the rubber band, is we are all meant to 443 00:30:40.839 --> 00:30:44.960 bounce. As humans, we are built to bounce. We come out of 444 00:30:44.960 --> 00:30:48.599 our mothers screaming and kicking right screaming, completely helpless. It's painful, it's 445 00:30:48.599 --> 00:30:52.880 not pleasant. When we learn to crawl, we crawl and we hit our 446 00:30:52.920 --> 00:30:55.759 faces on things, and when we try to walk, we climb up, 447 00:30:55.920 --> 00:30:57.839 we pull things down on us and then we let go and we fall down 448 00:30:57.839 --> 00:31:02.160 on our face. Fall, fall up, fall up, and somewhere in 449 00:31:02.200 --> 00:31:04.960 our teenage years we do people are looking at me and they're laughing at me. 450 00:31:06.559 --> 00:31:10.240 I can't fall anymore. I can't do anything wrong, I can't practice, 451 00:31:10.279 --> 00:31:14.319 I can't try because we don't want to look foolish. Well, it's 452 00:31:14.359 --> 00:31:18.119 part of our nature to be foolish. That's how we learn. That's why 453 00:31:18.160 --> 00:31:22.880 babies put everything in their mouth. We are tactile learners. So you must 454 00:31:22.160 --> 00:31:27.279 fall to succeed. If you fall, learn from it. Get back up, 455 00:31:27.960 --> 00:31:30.920 and that's why I like the rubber band. We are meant to bounce 456 00:31:32.160 --> 00:31:33.599 and when you get pulled to your strength, you're like, oh my gosh, 457 00:31:33.599 --> 00:31:37.759 I can't make it anymore. This is when you're supposed to be planning. 458 00:31:38.039 --> 00:31:41.400 This is when you start, you know, gearing up, because as 459 00:31:41.440 --> 00:31:48.240 soon as that pressure let's go, you fly. People look at me in 460 00:31:48.319 --> 00:31:51.839 my past, well, five years, you know, pretty much come on 461 00:31:51.880 --> 00:31:56.039 to us and everything for two years. But I was I was planning, 462 00:31:56.200 --> 00:31:57.880 even though I didn't realize I was planning, I was planning. So when 463 00:31:57.880 --> 00:32:02.799 I came out I was on high gear. My career did not really start 464 00:32:02.920 --> 00:32:09.480 until after my brain injury. Why? Because all that pressure had to go 465 00:32:09.640 --> 00:32:14.119 somewhere. It had to convert. You can't destroy it. Right. Energy 466 00:32:14.160 --> 00:32:16.240 cannot be destroyed, it can be converted. I had to convert it. 467 00:32:16.680 --> 00:32:20.960 So your listeners, if you're out there listening and you're like I've got a 468 00:32:20.960 --> 00:32:22.319 lot of stress in my life, my world is crumbling, you know, 469 00:32:22.480 --> 00:32:27.519 things are going bad in my life, look at that. Write it all 470 00:32:27.559 --> 00:32:32.079 down, do the pros and cons and realize you have the opportunity to choose 471 00:32:32.759 --> 00:32:37.359 where that energy is going to flow. Next focus on it and start working 472 00:32:37.400 --> 00:32:44.200 towards it. was there ever a point and and, and there's a reason 473 00:32:44.200 --> 00:32:49.240 why I'm asking this because again, we we tell the story and it always 474 00:32:49.319 --> 00:32:52.440 comes across that like we just keep moving forward, moving forward, moving forward. 475 00:32:52.480 --> 00:32:58.799 But so, was there ever a point in your rehabilitation and then where 476 00:32:58.839 --> 00:33:01.880 you have these setbacks and you felt like you're going backwards? And and, 477 00:33:02.240 --> 00:33:05.839 because a lot of people will have that Oh, I'm I'm pushing forward, 478 00:33:05.839 --> 00:33:08.200 I'm pushing forward, but I'll go back. I give up right. But 479 00:33:08.720 --> 00:33:14.319 again, it's the rubber band effect. You could probably back again. That's 480 00:33:14.319 --> 00:33:20.400 why I'm bringing this up, because I want to relate the bouncing to your 481 00:33:20.519 --> 00:33:25.279 journey, because it's not always forward progression. Sometimes there's two steps backwards and 482 00:33:25.319 --> 00:33:30.960 you but explain that. Explain your mindset through that one on that as well. 483 00:33:30.599 --> 00:33:35.119 Always have your mind set on the goal. Okay. So, even 484 00:33:35.119 --> 00:33:38.160 though with my brain injury, if I pushed too much, I had to 485 00:33:38.240 --> 00:33:43.160 learn my boundaries. So I still have my traumatic brain injury. I don't 486 00:33:43.160 --> 00:33:45.079 have those parts of my brain. My brain has completely rewired, but there 487 00:33:45.079 --> 00:33:50.079 are still times. Well, during the beginning of the journey, I would 488 00:33:50.119 --> 00:33:53.799 start I go outside and I walk because I wanted to walk. The Sun 489 00:33:53.839 --> 00:33:57.640 would get me and I pass out and I'd be down for four days. 490 00:33:58.960 --> 00:34:02.279 So I learned, don't walk out in the side, you know. And 491 00:34:02.319 --> 00:34:06.200 then, because I knew I'd have to pay it for four days. Um, 492 00:34:06.240 --> 00:34:09.000 I would go out speaking and I realized if I spoke for more than 493 00:34:09.599 --> 00:34:13.800 forty five minutes, if I hung around and talk to people for another hour 494 00:34:13.920 --> 00:34:16.440 or two, I'd be down for the whole weekend. So I realized, 495 00:34:16.519 --> 00:34:20.960 okay, I'M gonna come in and speak, but I'm going to have to 496 00:34:21.039 --> 00:34:22.679 leave. You'll have to keep the crowds away from me, and they do. 497 00:34:22.760 --> 00:34:27.599 Why I do? Because too many voices at once. My brain doesn't 498 00:34:27.599 --> 00:34:30.039 have a filter anymore. So like me, walk into a crowded room and 499 00:34:30.079 --> 00:34:35.320 you don't hear everybody talking, you hear the person you're looking at. I 500 00:34:35.400 --> 00:34:39.039 hear everybody, and so my brain would overwork and it would shut me down 501 00:34:39.039 --> 00:34:43.159 for days. So, yes, I had a lot of up for back, 502 00:34:43.199 --> 00:34:45.480 for a back back, but but what my purpose of it was is 503 00:34:45.559 --> 00:34:51.159 I knew I was learning my limitations and adjusting them ever so slightly so I 504 00:34:51.159 --> 00:34:53.360 can move a little bit further so yes, there is lots of back and 505 00:34:53.400 --> 00:34:57.719 forth, back and forth, but those are not meant to make you stop. 506 00:34:58.079 --> 00:35:01.280 That meant you for you to learn your parameters that you can work through 507 00:35:01.360 --> 00:35:06.400 until you can grow stronger. So here I am five, what's almost six 508 00:35:06.480 --> 00:35:09.760 years after my brain injury and I still do it. So I have my 509 00:35:09.760 --> 00:35:14.679 my TV show, my mental shift show. I took a whole three months 510 00:35:14.760 --> 00:35:17.760 off. Why? Because two days a week I was having my show for 511 00:35:17.840 --> 00:35:22.320 an hour and I talked to my client, my my guest for thirty minutes 512 00:35:22.360 --> 00:35:27.639 afterwards. Each I short circuited, I was forgetting things, my sentences started 513 00:35:27.679 --> 00:35:31.519 breaking up and I realized I may seem Gung Ho, I may seem perfect 514 00:35:31.559 --> 00:35:36.599 and fine and everything's great, my brain is working fine, but it's not. 515 00:35:37.360 --> 00:35:38.960 I had to step back again, and so now my show is only 516 00:35:39.000 --> 00:35:43.280 one day a week because I need to know. Yes, this is a 517 00:35:43.280 --> 00:35:45.639 good thing, yes, this show is wonderful, but my brain can't handle 518 00:35:46.239 --> 00:35:52.480 four hours straight of intense talking in a conversation. Yeah, always learning. 519 00:35:53.480 --> 00:35:59.079 And when that's again, and you said that earlier, to these there's this 520 00:35:59.119 --> 00:36:00.880 is how we learn, right, we go, we do the foard and 521 00:36:00.960 --> 00:36:06.760 we hit something and we hit some barrier whatever and we go, oh, 522 00:36:06.800 --> 00:36:12.519 there there's a wall, so pivot to the left, pivot to the right, 523 00:36:12.559 --> 00:36:15.679 go around the wall and or going. And don't be married to the 524 00:36:15.719 --> 00:36:19.440 process. Right. We're always shifting gears. Were always doing no, you 525 00:36:19.440 --> 00:36:23.960 you likened it to sending the GPS. That M being open to different roads. 526 00:36:24.000 --> 00:36:27.880 And why not take the different road, maybe that road that the GPS 527 00:36:27.920 --> 00:36:30.920 has set you on? So I live in Colorado, you live in Colorado 528 00:36:31.360 --> 00:36:36.119 and, Um, there's just scenery everywhere, right. And so if we 529 00:36:36.159 --> 00:36:38.280 would go on the path of the GPS was set us, if we're going 530 00:36:38.360 --> 00:36:43.159 from here to Denver, right, and it will take us to go up 531 00:36:43.199 --> 00:36:47.960 by but how much more beautiful would it be to go up the highway, 532 00:36:47.960 --> 00:36:52.559 the back highway, up through Parker, right, and it's it's a different 533 00:36:52.639 --> 00:36:57.159 journey, it's a different path, different scenery. And so don't be afraid 534 00:36:57.239 --> 00:37:00.360 to hit that wall and go, okay, well, there's construction here, 535 00:37:00.440 --> 00:37:04.440 so let's go this way to go that, because you'll never know, that 536 00:37:04.519 --> 00:37:07.480 wall might be set there for you for a reason. There's there's other little 537 00:37:07.480 --> 00:37:10.119 pieces that are that are in store for you. If you just learn to 538 00:37:10.159 --> 00:37:15.079 adapt, learn to pivot and it's an amazing thing. Yeah, and I 539 00:37:15.079 --> 00:37:20.039 think about, well, I didn't tell you everything I do, but on 540 00:37:20.079 --> 00:37:23.840 my roads of on discovering the new me, basically the real me, you 541 00:37:23.840 --> 00:37:27.719 know, something would happen. I do, I can't go that way. 542 00:37:28.199 --> 00:37:30.239 Okay, I'm gonna go right. And I went right and now I'm gonna 543 00:37:30.360 --> 00:37:36.519 I do voiceovers for movies. I do uh, I read children's books, 544 00:37:36.559 --> 00:37:39.079 audio books for blind children. I mean that brought me to a whole another 545 00:37:39.119 --> 00:37:43.559 segment of something I didn't even know I could do, you know. And 546 00:37:43.559 --> 00:37:45.960 then I get through that and I turn again and do hey, you want 547 00:37:45.960 --> 00:37:47.239 to be on the want to be on a SCI FI movie? Sure, 548 00:37:47.440 --> 00:37:52.119 I mean so, I if you look at my entire thing of everything I've 549 00:37:52.159 --> 00:37:57.280 done, it seems so we go woggly, but they all come down to 550 00:37:57.360 --> 00:38:01.960 communication and opening up and being really yourself. But I would have never found 551 00:38:02.000 --> 00:38:06.320 any of that if I was set on the path that I wanted to get 552 00:38:06.320 --> 00:38:07.800 on. If I'm only going to go a B, I'm not gonna go 553 00:38:07.840 --> 00:38:10.519 to see, I'm not gonna look at X Y Z, I wouldn't have 554 00:38:10.519 --> 00:38:15.719 discovered any of these things. So take the road less traveled when it comes 555 00:38:15.760 --> 00:38:17.960 in front of you. Sometimes those doors are shut for a reason. What 556 00:38:19.119 --> 00:38:22.360 do yeah, when the goal stays the same. That's the other important piece. 557 00:38:22.400 --> 00:38:25.880 The goal stays the same. It's the journey to get to that goal 558 00:38:25.960 --> 00:38:30.559 is what can shift. And and don't be yes, so, but let's 559 00:38:31.159 --> 00:38:34.639 you just said something that was really cool, and I say this a lot, 560 00:38:34.800 --> 00:38:37.440 and so I don't know that I've ever covered this really on the show, 561 00:38:37.440 --> 00:38:42.400 but let's talk about it. You say you said you're on your journey 562 00:38:42.400 --> 00:38:47.119 to discover the true you. I think that's a very important thing because a 563 00:38:47.159 --> 00:38:52.400 lot of us are living the true us. We're living the imposter person, 564 00:38:52.519 --> 00:38:58.760 right the person and impositive syndrome goes into these native beliefs, but I taken 565 00:38:58.800 --> 00:39:02.360 positive syndrome to the whole different level of we're living this life that's not who 566 00:39:02.400 --> 00:39:07.960 we are. And and this idea that you're higher self, your true self, 567 00:39:08.280 --> 00:39:13.719 is they're trying to guide you, trying to say this is see that, 568 00:39:13.719 --> 00:39:15.920 that's what I want you to do, but we ignore it because this 569 00:39:15.119 --> 00:39:19.159 is a soft voice. Sometimes it's a loud voice, depending on how you 570 00:39:19.199 --> 00:39:23.760 know the get up right Um, but it's getting you to the true you, 571 00:39:23.960 --> 00:39:28.840 the person who you truly are, and right now we're just a lot 572 00:39:28.880 --> 00:39:32.360 of us are just wearing these costumes, right, we're acting and, yeah, 573 00:39:32.400 --> 00:39:36.079 we're in a mask. We're not as that person. So I love 574 00:39:36.119 --> 00:39:38.599 that you brought that out, that you're you're we're finding the truth and you're 575 00:39:38.599 --> 00:39:44.400 still evolving. It's it's a constant journey of stepping into that truth, that 576 00:39:44.480 --> 00:39:49.199 true self. But but you, you now have recognized that. So talk 577 00:39:49.239 --> 00:39:53.599 a little bit about the true, the true Michelle. Well, the old 578 00:39:53.639 --> 00:39:57.960 Michelle. We have to get to her first. She thought was supposed to 579 00:39:58.360 --> 00:40:01.079 grow old, get married, have kids, have a White House with a 580 00:40:01.079 --> 00:40:06.639 white picket fence with little roses bushes around. I had this vision. I 581 00:40:06.679 --> 00:40:08.079 was supposed to go to school, I was supposed to be an engineer, 582 00:40:08.360 --> 00:40:12.360 I was supposed to disupposed, disposed, disposed, disposed, disposed to again. 583 00:40:12.679 --> 00:40:15.880 And then as I got older and things kept veerying off, I thought 584 00:40:15.920 --> 00:40:20.800 I wasn't good enough and so I just kind of lived. I got quiet. 585 00:40:21.280 --> 00:40:24.000 I became a quality examiner, because you know, that's what good Filipino 586 00:40:24.079 --> 00:40:29.400 women do. We're we're good, we're quiet, we're friendly, we like 587 00:40:29.519 --> 00:40:31.920 to cook. I mean, so I was going into this parameter of what 588 00:40:32.039 --> 00:40:36.639 I thought I was supposed to be and I lived that way for many, 589 00:40:36.639 --> 00:40:40.880 many years and it took that car hitting me, kind of knocking me out 590 00:40:40.880 --> 00:40:45.039 of Juggle, knocking me out of my my lane, to make me realize 591 00:40:45.719 --> 00:40:50.719 who am I. I mean, I've I've been doing what I was told 592 00:40:50.719 --> 00:40:53.639 to do all my life. I was a good little girl and I realized 593 00:40:53.679 --> 00:40:58.239 that I never wanted to be an engineer. Why am I beating myself up 594 00:40:58.280 --> 00:41:01.440 about this? You know, I never wanted a big White House of the 595 00:41:01.440 --> 00:41:05.800 picket fence and rose bushes. I honestly want a cottage on the beach. 596 00:41:05.840 --> 00:41:07.639 That's what I'm working for, you know. So it's like what, why 597 00:41:07.800 --> 00:41:12.719 was I beating myself up? And so I think about, you know, 598 00:41:12.760 --> 00:41:15.639 all the people I meet in this world and you know, when I'm speaking 599 00:41:15.639 --> 00:41:22.519 on stage or whatever in my coaching, so many of us are so unhappy, 600 00:41:22.360 --> 00:41:27.360 so unhappy because we're not what we thought were supposed to be. And 601 00:41:27.360 --> 00:41:30.920 when you break that down to what they think they're supposed to be, it's 602 00:41:30.920 --> 00:41:35.320 not what they want in the first place. And it's like why do we 603 00:41:35.440 --> 00:41:38.119 do that to ourselves? You gotta let yourself free. I want you to 604 00:41:38.119 --> 00:41:45.119 write down what makes you smile, what makes your heart sore. Go there. 605 00:41:45.000 --> 00:41:49.440 I mean, I I just accepted a job. I'm singing with the 606 00:41:49.519 --> 00:41:52.880 band now. Why? I have always loved to sing. When you if 607 00:41:52.880 --> 00:41:57.000 you ever see me on stage, if you ever watched my podcast or my 608 00:41:57.000 --> 00:42:00.800 my TV show, I always get a song and some more. Why? 609 00:42:00.079 --> 00:42:05.280 Because I love to sing. But I forbid myself from singing, because that's 610 00:42:05.320 --> 00:42:12.159 what not engineers. Engineers do not sing. Yeah, you can let your 611 00:42:12.159 --> 00:42:15.639 dog bark. It's okay, it's it's it's all real life here. Um. 612 00:42:15.960 --> 00:42:22.199 See, that is so, because I say this all the time and 613 00:42:22.199 --> 00:42:25.360 it is. This is really just qualifying and quantifying. What I tell people 614 00:42:25.400 --> 00:42:29.840 all the time that more often than not, the reasons why we're not hitting 615 00:42:29.880 --> 00:42:32.360 our goals or we're not satisfied with the goals is because we're chasing the wrong 616 00:42:32.360 --> 00:42:38.239 goal. We're chasing when other people said that we should be either what society 617 00:42:38.360 --> 00:42:44.480 says, this is where we should do, and or we go after jobs. 618 00:42:44.639 --> 00:42:46.639 I literally hear kids coming out of high school going, well, what 619 00:42:46.639 --> 00:42:51.039 do you want to do? Well, you know, I t is a 620 00:42:51.079 --> 00:42:52.559 really good field. Right now there's a lot of jobs and they're like, 621 00:42:52.719 --> 00:42:55.000 but is that what you want to do, or is that just because you 622 00:42:55.039 --> 00:42:59.320 feel like you can get a job in doing that? Because you can do 623 00:42:59.679 --> 00:43:04.880 you can get a job and doing whatever. But we're so programmed of not 624 00:43:05.039 --> 00:43:07.800 thinking in that way. We're told at a certain age to stop dreaming, 625 00:43:07.800 --> 00:43:13.960 to get out of the fantasy world and start being practical. But practicals boring. 626 00:43:14.440 --> 00:43:17.960 It's so boring. Let's do something that that inspires you, that drives 627 00:43:19.000 --> 00:43:22.920 you, and I love that. How your story you're like, I didn't 628 00:43:22.920 --> 00:43:25.199 even want to be an engineer, I didn't even want to have this this 629 00:43:25.559 --> 00:43:28.920 I wanted the house on the beach, the cottage on the beach. So 630 00:43:29.000 --> 00:43:32.840 go for the cottage on the beach and just chasing that, the passion of 631 00:43:32.880 --> 00:43:37.519 going after that. That will drive you every it doesn't even matter at this 632 00:43:37.559 --> 00:43:40.000 point because you have this purpose in life and you're excited to get up and 633 00:43:40.039 --> 00:43:45.760 go after that cottage on the beach and and that's an important piece that I 634 00:43:45.800 --> 00:43:50.679 just I feel like the vast majority of people they're chasing the wrong thing. 635 00:43:51.199 --> 00:43:55.000 Yeah, that's exactly it was something that planted in US younger that they thought 636 00:43:55.079 --> 00:43:59.440 this is what's supposed to happen and I must go there. It doesn't matter 637 00:43:59.480 --> 00:44:01.840 how miser bullet makes me, this is where I've got to go. No, 638 00:44:02.480 --> 00:44:06.840 no, it. I mean, it took me to fifty to realize 639 00:44:07.039 --> 00:44:09.679 I was going across the wrong bridge. I want to go swing that way. 640 00:44:09.679 --> 00:44:13.480 I shouldn't be walking this way, I want to be jumping this way, 641 00:44:13.639 --> 00:44:16.960 and it's a beautiful, enlightening thing to realize that I don't have to 642 00:44:17.000 --> 00:44:21.840 be what I thought I was supposed to be. Yeah, and, and 643 00:44:21.880 --> 00:44:24.519 it doesn't matter that you're fifty, it doesn't matter where, when, whenever 644 00:44:24.559 --> 00:44:29.920 you make that realization, go for it, like in fifties young, right, 645 00:44:30.159 --> 00:44:32.280 if that's not old, that's just it's just an age. And so 646 00:44:32.320 --> 00:44:36.159 you have some wisdom or other people don't have. But that doesn't mean that 647 00:44:36.159 --> 00:44:38.599 it's too late. It's never too late. and honestly, I swear I'm 648 00:44:38.639 --> 00:44:44.679 younger now than I was in my thirties. I'm younger at heart now. 649 00:44:45.239 --> 00:44:51.639 Yeah, because you felt you were in bondings before and there's a freedom to 650 00:44:51.719 --> 00:44:55.559 that and you don't even you don't experience your age. So this, yeah, 651 00:44:55.880 --> 00:45:00.599 this is so. This is I always start in coaching practice. I 652 00:45:00.639 --> 00:45:04.360 always start from the end and I have. Why don't you always start from 653 00:45:04.360 --> 00:45:07.280 the end? Because it's your goal. It's the goal, is the most 654 00:45:07.320 --> 00:45:10.719 important piece here in my mind, because if it's not the right one, 655 00:45:12.400 --> 00:45:15.440 you're never going to feel fulfilled. It's never going to be fulfilled. Yeah, 656 00:45:15.480 --> 00:45:19.480 you're going the wrong way if you don't have one step. Yeah, 657 00:45:19.559 --> 00:45:24.599 absolutely, Michelle, we're getting close to time here, but you have. 658 00:45:24.840 --> 00:45:27.840 I mean there's so much that you do. You have the two books, 659 00:45:27.880 --> 00:45:30.199 you do the you have the Ted talks. So I'm sure people can find 660 00:45:30.199 --> 00:45:35.880 the Ted talks. Is there? Was it in a specific they just look 661 00:45:35.920 --> 00:45:38.480 for Michelle and Ted talks and that should pop up. I have a brain 662 00:45:38.519 --> 00:45:43.559 injury, so I make everything very easy. If you go to my website, 663 00:45:43.599 --> 00:45:47.320 MICHELLE MORASS DOT COM, every link to everything, every social media, 664 00:45:47.440 --> 00:45:53.559 every video I've ever done, they're all tapped out. That's it doesn't take 665 00:45:53.559 --> 00:45:58.599 a brain injury to love simplicity. That that makes it easy for me and 666 00:45:58.639 --> 00:46:01.000 for everybody. So and so if they want to work with you, as 667 00:46:01.039 --> 00:46:04.760 if someone wants to work with you for you being there coach, they go 668 00:46:04.840 --> 00:46:07.039 to that's the same place and they that's just they just reach out. Yeah, 669 00:46:07.039 --> 00:46:10.159 I go to my website and it says book Michelle, but in the 670 00:46:10.199 --> 00:46:15.199 book Michelle it says fifteen minutes um consultation. If you want to meet with 671 00:46:15.199 --> 00:46:17.639 me, just click that. That's a free link and then I've got other 672 00:46:17.639 --> 00:46:22.360 things that they sequentially go up. We get there first and then talk to 673 00:46:22.400 --> 00:46:23.639 me. We can figure out what how we can work together, if we 674 00:46:23.719 --> 00:46:28.199 even aligned together, and then we can feel from there. Yeah, well, 675 00:46:28.320 --> 00:46:30.679 I like how you said that. Do we even align together? Because 676 00:46:30.679 --> 00:46:35.119 you may not, and that's and that's okay. But I want to thank 677 00:46:35.159 --> 00:46:38.679 you so much. Amazing Story, like my I love that my sister introduced 678 00:46:38.719 --> 00:46:44.039 us, because there's it's I get so amped when I talk to people like 679 00:46:44.119 --> 00:46:45.480 you and just like yeah, see, that's why I keep telling people. 680 00:46:45.519 --> 00:46:50.119 But from this point of view, look how how true this really is. 681 00:46:50.440 --> 00:46:53.920 and Um, so it just was just an amazing conversation and I appreciate you 682 00:46:54.000 --> 00:46:58.199 so much for taking the time to come on the show. Thank you for 683 00:46:58.280 --> 00:47:00.880 having me, as part of my passion to come and shows like business spread 684 00:47:00.960 --> 00:47:07.920 what I've learned and you've you've learned a lot. So, uh, well, 685 00:47:07.280 --> 00:47:09.239 I don't even know how I don't want this to end, but I'm 686 00:47:09.239 --> 00:47:13.280 going to end it. So Um again, thank you again, and everybody 687 00:47:13.280 --> 00:47:16.880 else who's out there. If you feel drawn to Um Michelle's story and you 688 00:47:16.920 --> 00:47:20.360 want to know more about her, go to a website. If you want 689 00:47:20.400 --> 00:47:23.880 to set up that that quick little discovery call, do it, because it's 690 00:47:23.880 --> 00:47:28.360 the first step. First step to your journey is is. That's it right. 691 00:47:28.440 --> 00:47:30.920 So I want to thank you again and everybody else. We will be 692 00:47:30.960 --> 00:47:38.880 having conversations real soon. Thanks for tuning in. If you've found value in 693 00:47:38.880 --> 00:47:43.679 this episode, the best thing you can do is to subscribe, rate or 694 00:47:43.719 --> 00:47:46.639 review this podcast. If you would like to further investigate how you can flip 695 00:47:46.679 --> 00:47:52.719 your own mindset, feel free to contact me through my website at www dot 696 00:47:52.800 --> 00:47:57.400 garrett goggins dot com. Can't wait to catch you on the next episode.